You should give your passion a higher priority than your budget

You only live once. According to Hebrews 9:27, we are appointed for a time to live and then to face judgment. God puts dreams on people’s heart and people need to be true to themselves and pursue what’s on their heart. My government job would not pay for my 2nd class towards  my Master’s of Arts in Human Services counseling, so I decided to take a leap of faith and get on the university payment plan for just this one class as I limp through towards my degree in Human Services, my passion. It was my lifelong dream to have a child, and now I have realized the dream, however we made the sacrifice of living on a single income so my son would be lovingly raised by a parent instead of putting him in daycare, but we are still feeling the pinch. Decisions such as these may not be what’s best for the wallet, but if God gives you a dream or a passion, go after it with all of your heart and trust God to provide. It is not irresponsible or foolish to take steps towards your lifelong passions, hopes, dreams or desires as long as they are God given, God glorifying, and aligned with His will. Those who seek the Lord shall not want any good thing. Psalm 34:10. I constantly earnestly seek God every day and I will say I am spiritually stronger than I was a year ago. I do consider myself very budget minded, and I do not take major decisions lightly, nor do I make them without much prayer.

According to Psalm 84:11, no good thing does God withhold from those who walk uprightly. I ask God to search my heart every day to see if there is any wicked way in me or impure motives, for the prayers of a righteous man avails much according to James 5:16. And I pray very earnestly and ferverently. I have been praying this way for my dreams to come true and for the desires of the things He has made me to love the most to be fulfilled, met and satisfied for many years and God has always come through. I know God will not fail us now. God did not bring us this far, only to not bring us the rest of the way. I am not putting God to the test like Jesus stated to Satan while in the desert in Luke 4:12. We should come boldly to the throne of grace like it says in Hebrews 4:16. I have been praying very earnestly and fiercely like the widow in Luke 18:1-8 to bless me with not only the finances to pay for those goals I have already pursued, but for the ones I still feed led to pursue, and I am not expecting no for an answer. I have asked, sought and knocked every day for God to finance my latest dreams for over 5-7 years non-stop day in and day out, and I am not stopping until I get an answer like Jacob said in Genesis 34:26 as well as stated in Matthew 7:7-11.

My decision to get Mercy was also a leap of faith. We were already living on a single income, but with my husband staying home, we could get a puppy. Money was tight. Even so, I pursued my God given dream of getting a Golden Retriever puppy so I could go for the gold so to speak. I entrust God to provide. In Luke 14:28, we are to count the cost to see if we are to pursue a major endeavor, and we did. But even if it does not quite appear on paper that it will fit into your budget, you need to go by faith and not by sight for faith is the substance of things hoped for, the substance of things not seen. I still believe to this day that God will provide for all of our dreams, even though in the natural it appears bleak. I am not advocating irresponsible money management or spending money you don’t have. How you steward God’s resources is still between you and God. If God is telling you in your heart that you cannot afford something, then by all means heed that direction. There are many times when God tells us to wait. There are times when we must delay the pursuit of our dreams if they are not being done in faith, for whatever is not of faith is sin. James 4:3 says that when we ask with selfish motives then we do not receive. Sometimes I have unbelief about the decisions I have made since they seem far fetched, unrealistic or perhaps even wrong, but James 1:6 says that if you ask wavering in your faith or doubting, he is like a branch being tossed by the wind and should not expect what he has asked for. Mark 11:25 says therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. I often pray to God, “I believe, help my unbelief”. I do consider myself a dreamer and many people might think that I am living in a fantasy world. However, what divides fantasy from reality when it comes to dreams requiring miracles is the measure of your faith. I understand if my approach might be unorthodox, but I believe in God’s gracious generosity. He will provide. Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Luke 11:11 I am seriously expecting God to answer my prayers for my dreams to come true and then taking action accordingly. I do my best to not pursue pipe dreams, but to strive for what I believe is possible with God, for nothing is impossible with God. No action do I take without much thought or without first seeking God in prayer concerning it.

God has always been faithful. I do not consider myself to be putting God to the test like stated in Deuteronomy 6:16, Luke 4:12 or Matthew 4:7. I am serious when I pray, expecting God to answer. Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us. Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4:16 I expect and believe with as much faith as I can muster that God will not fail us, but will come through, equipping me financially, emotionally, spiritually, mentally and socially for my calling. I know what I’ve said tonight in this blog unlike any message you might have heard in any church, but I am standing on God’s promises as found in the Bible. I expect God to be strong where I am weak knowing that I am doing what I can and trusting Him to do what I cannot all the while trusting that I am doing the right thing and making good choices.

I admit, that I do struggle with doubts about my decision making. I often wonder if I made the right choices since according to the books, the finances are not yet lining up. However, I am seriously taking God at His word to the best of my knowledge and belief. I am currently making sincere efforts to earn more money to finance my dreams. I am working with an entrepreneurial spirit, the same spirit that will allow me to start my non-profit ministry in hopefully the not too distant future. I heard a song last night that stated that when one is on his or her deathbed they will be thinking without regret about the chances they took. I worry about my finances. No doubt about it. However, I choose to still press in and press on to new possibilities with a clear conscience and confidence not being afraid of the what ifs doing the best that I can. I am actually naturally a very cautious person who does not like to take risks. A lot of the dreams God placed on my heart by God’s grace came true after I waited many years and through much effort. I am still striving today towards a more promising future, hoping and expecting to empower others to do the same. I know that God will not only bless us with what we need to not go under financially, but that He will also provide what I need to serve Him full time, doing what He’s called me to do without having to worry about money. God will not forsake You. He has not forsaken us either. In Hebrews 11:6 it states that without faith, it is impossible to please God, but that God is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him. I have been diligently seeking God for over 12 years now. My soul I believe is prospering more and more, and God desires that we prosper even as our soul prospers as stated 3 John 1:2 I can’t promise that God will give you all that you want, but He will give you what you treasure and hold most dear in your heart if you will obey Him. The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want. Psalm 23:1. In all actuality, I desire meaning more than I desire stable finances. Sometimes you gotta live on the edge!

About journeywithmercy

I am seeking a meaningful life in Jesus Christ. I am not sure exactly what that means, but I am on a journey to find out. I seek a most amazing way beyond my wildest dreams to fulfill my calling, purpose and destiny while enjoying beauty, art, culture, nature and science the whole way thorugh.
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